It's A Date!

Yeah, so, remember that time that I thought I had a reception venue picked out? Um, not so much, it turns out.

BUT...now I really do! For real this time! I'm super excited. It's in Fort Worth (like I originally wanted), it's beautiful (like I wanted) and it came in less expensive than the other option that I almost decided on (bonus). And they had my preferred date available! I'm officially getting married on November 6, 2010!

Holy wedding bells, Batman!

Now I just have to find a ceremony location that also has my date available. So the search continues...oy.

Mission Accomplished...Maybe

This is my dream wedding location: Blair Castle in Scotland. Due to budget concerns, this idea has been scrapped.

Moving on...

This weekend was a whirlwind of wedding planning. I managed to book five locations for Lobster and I to go look at in downtown Fort Worth. My mom and my sister Cupcake, the Maid of Honor (a.k.a. MOH), joined us for most of the tours. While most brides would feel overwhelmed to have so many people giving her advice and opinions while looking at so many places, I must say I was glad that they were all there.

The first two locations were really lovely 100 year old buildings that had been renovated into ballrooms. Although I liked the space of the first venue more than the second, only the second had my preferred wedding date available. Neither venue provided linens or anything other than tables and chairs (ugly chairs, I might add) so I would have to spend money on tablecloths, chair covers, etc. The second venue was a bit more light and bright and I felt I could work with it and the lady there was willing to negotiate price with me (bonus points for her). So we took lots of pics and notes and continued on our journey.

The third location would have been nice if it (a) were not run down, (b) did not provide super cheesy decorations and (c) not located in the semi-ghetto. We moved on fairly quickly from that one.

The fourth venue was the venue Lobster liked best. It was an old movie theater that had been renovated into event rooms and ballrooms. The space was very nice, very elegant and the location was AMAZING (in the middle of downtown). However, it really bothered me that the ballroom had no windows. I'm a nature girl and I would have preferred to be married outside but I don't want the headache of worrying about the weather on my wedding day. So I prefer windows, especially if it affords a view of the city lights. Also, the venue was more expensive, although they provided linens. The catering and bar situation they offered, though, left much to be desired and they did not offer tastings until a month before the wedding. Um, RED FLAG. Sorry, folks, but I'm not going to be under contract with you without having first tasted what you're serving my guests. I did not like that one bit.

After the fourth tour, mom and MOH headed home for other engagements and Lobster and I headed to Starbucks to compare notes. We determined that, so far, it was between Venue No. 2 and Venue No. 4. We still had one more to look at, however, so we headed out.

Our fifth venue had two spaces in which we could hold the reception. The first one we looked at was being set up for a wedding that night and it was really lovely and elegant and very expensive looking but I was not blown away for some reason. But then we looked at the second room and even though it was not being set up for a wedding, I fell in love with it immediately. We went back to the event manager's office to discuss numbers and I was heartbroken to learn that it was the most expensive venue we had seen so far and he was not willing to negotiate with me. AT ALL. ON ANYTHING. Not even the tiniest, least expensive little detail. It really irritated me and made me sad. All the way home I was agonizing about it because I fell in love with the place but it was more money than we wanted to spend and the fact that the guy wouldn't even negotiate a little had me seething. Of course, Lobster told me that if it was the location I wanted, we'd make it work, but I still felt sick about it.

So I prayed about it that night and the next morning I got up and decided to glance over my spreadsheet of places to check out (yes, I made a spreadsheet). There was one place that had been high on my list and that I really wanted to go see but I had already discounted it because it wasn't in Fort Worth but in McKinney which is pretty far away. But I looked over their brochure again and their website and I just had the feeling I should check it out before making any decisions. So I called the place and I was surprised to learn that they had no problem with me coming over to see the place after that day's event ended. So Lobster and I trekked out to McKinney and as soon as I walked in the place I knew it was the right one. It just felt right. It's an old restored opera house that has been turned into a boutique hotel and ballroom. The site is gorgeous and they provide linens. I wanted to see if they had my preferred date available but the manager wasn't in so I was going to have to call on Monday. But just as we were leaving, another staff member arrived who was able to access the schedule and she was able to tell me that while my preferred weekend was already booked, the next weekend wasn't. Okay. I can live with that.

So, now I'm just waiting on their catering manager to give me a proposal so I can sit down and compare numbers with the other places we saw. I am fairly certain that this is the place but I just have to do my due diligence before I make any huge decisions. Gotta get all the facts. I really hope it all works out because it will be a huge relief to get this part of the process done!

Bride Brain

This is what I'm calling the craziness that's going on in my head right now. It really should be classified as a legitimate disease that is spread through placing shiny rings on the third finger of the left hand. Because all I do these days is think about planning a wedding.

I know. I'm driving myself crazy, too!

But what's difficult about it is that I'm trying to plan an affordable wedding. I would not be having issues if I were planning an extravagant bash at any location my little heart desired (a chapel in the Highlands of Scotland). That, my friends, would be easy. But planning an elegant, refined affair on a beer and nachos budget is FLIPPING FRUSTRATING!

My main complaint: venue. If I could just find an affordable (but not cheesy) (or ghetto) (or circa 1975) location that did not force me to use a sub-par (expensive) (tasteless) (limited choices) caterer, I'll be golden. Until that time, I have Bride Brain, and I apologize that I cannot think of other things more interesting to blog about right now. I promise I'll get better soon.

(Maybe.)

(Here's hoping.)

(Oh, and not to mention that alcohol is uber-expensive, too, but that's an entirely different post...)

1 "To-Do" Down, 4,827 More to Go

This weekend was pretty darn exciting. My mom and Cupcake and I planned on meeting in Fort Worth to go look at wedding dresses. I had been chatting with a girl from L.A. about buying her wedding dress, a gorgeous Pronovias, for a very discounted rate. I wanted to go try on the dress first to make sure it would fit before making such a large purchase. (Side note for those not wedding dress savvy: the size of the wedding dress is greatly disproportionate to the size a girl wears in regular clothes. For instance, I wear a 4 in most clothes but in a wedding dress I wear anywhere from an 8 to a 10. It's ridiculous.)

Anyway, so mom and Cupcake and I head to the bridal shop and proceed to try on a billion dresses. Mom and Cupcake arrived before me. A woman greeted them and asked if they had an appointment. We didn't. Evidently, appointments are "preferred" (read: you're sure to go to hell if you don't make an appointment with a bridal shop.) Luckily, the Bridal Shop Gods were feeling benevolent that day and forgave us our sin. These people are far too serious.

Eventually, we were ushered into a dressing room/waiting area. The poor woman attending me, Vicki, was a little old lady with the patience of a saint. I was a good foot taller than her but she heaved those heavy dresses over my head like a champ. It was a little odd, however, when she came into the dressing room with me, handed me a corset bra and ordered me to "strip down and put on the bra."  Er...excuse me? Not even my mother sees "the girls" anymore. But there I was, naked as a jaybird because little old Vicki demanded it.

At first, I chose only Pronovias dresses because they're gorgeous and I was trying them on to see if the one I found online would fit me. It turns out, the online dress would have been a size too small. But when I tried them on I just didn't feel like me in them. And let's not even discuss how expensive they are. So I went back to the racks and started looking at all designers to try to get a sense of what I really wanted. I finally narrowed it down to three: one my mom loved (but I think it was because it was the first dress I put on and so it had an immediate impact), and two others that were champagne colored but very different styles. Of course, I had to try on all three at least two more times to help me decide which one I liked best. Poor Vicki.

Finally, we got it narrowed down to the two champagne dresses, one of which was a Maggie Sottero. I felt like a million bucks in both of them. But I kept looking at the Maggie thinking, "This might be the one." But I couldn't really say it out loud because I wanted to know my mom and Cupcake's true feelings. I put on the Maggie one more time and went out to stand in front of the mirror. All three of us just stood there looking at my reflection. Finally, I couldn't take it anymore and I said, "I think this is the one."

Suddenly, my mom starts clapping and saying, "Me too!" and Cupcake bursts into tears. Then I start crying. Then Vicki starts crying. And my mom's snapping pictures of all of us crying (you wonder where I get my obsessive need to take pictures of everything?).

Then I turned to Vicki and asked her if I could buy the dress of the rack at a discount. One of the best things about the Maggie was that it was already a very good price. Far less than the one I was thinking of buying online at a discount. But I knew that if I bought off the rack I could possibly get an even better price. And, lucky for me, the dress that I tried on fit perfectly. So Vicki went to ask the store owner and came back and offered the dress for $100 cheaper. I looked to mom who nodded her head vigorously and said, "Let's do it!"

So I bought my wedding dress. At the first shop I went to. During the first day of looking. Holy cow!

But the fun didn't stop there. We then headed to a vineyard just outside of Fort Worth to consider for a venue. It was beautiful and quite reasonably priced compared to all other locations I've looked into so far. I want to take Lobster to see it (he's been out of town since last Tuesday) but I think it will be a top contender!

So that was my weekend. It was so much fun and it will be an amazing memory for me, my mom and Cupcake.

Deep Breath

To say that I am overwhelmed is an understatement.

From the time I was a little girl I dreamed of my wedding. Except for a few bitter years in college and law school, my wedding was one of my biggest dreams. When Lobster and I started to fall in love, that dream started to rise up from the depths of my heart again and I allowed myself to begin hoping that one day it would come true.

Now here we are on the cusp of the beginnings of my dream come true. And I've suddenly come to understand one thing I never realized before in all my childhood fantasies...

Holy mother of pearl, weddings are flippin' expensive!

*Begin Rant*

I mean, really. What makes an empty room with a bunch of tables and chairs worth $3,000 just for the privilege of using it for four hours? And what exactly is it about a white dress that makes it five times more expensive than a dress of any other color? Is it sprinkled with magic fairy dust? Will it make my boobs grow or melt the fat off my hips? Well, then sign me up! Otherwise, ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?

Maybe this wouldn't be so mind-blowing to me if my parents were taking care of the financial burden of a wedding but I don't expect them to. This is my wedding. Why should my parents go into debt for a one-day event? I think it's ridiculous for ANYONE to pay this much money for what really amounts to a big party. Yes, of course I want all the wonderful things that all other brides want. This is a once in a lifetime deal for me; I want it to be beautiful, I want it to be memorable, I want it to be elegant, I want it to ROCK.

But, it really makes me angry that this whole wedding industry essentially rapes people of their hard earned money by jacking up the cost of everything simply because its a wedding.

So the question is: how do I orchestrate an elegant, beautiful, memorable, rockin', but CHEAP wedding? Is it even possible?

If this is how they want to play, I'll play. I'll put my gameface on. I am not a pleasant person when I have my gameface on. I will take no prisoners. I will not be investing one cent of my hard-earned money until these people, the vendors, prove to me that their location, cake, dress, photos, food, etc. is worth every penny. So far I have seen nothing that has justified such costs.

If all else fails, I am not above taking my money to the nearest tropical island and paying some random preacher to say the magic words.

*End Rant*

Deep breath.